Ace Wisdom

Grasshopper No.l elected to have a procedure done to her heart to eliminate the random accelerated heartbeat. The procedure has been around for 25 years and was performed by a doctor that has done it since it’s inception. They kiddingly call him “God” for the procedure.
It started with an early 5:00 AM trip from Sheboygan to Milwaukee (I think the sun was just coming up). 6:00 AM “check in” at the Milwaukee Hospital. 8:00 AM the operation began.
They stuff something down your throat (I guess to help you breathe).
I’m not sure about the consciousness of the patient but I believe she was oblivious to the medical procedure. They entered her heart by way of the groin. They open a major artery in the groin and used three medical devices to crawl up to the heart. It is incredible to think they put 3 devices in one artery (a three lane highway if you will). The devices were used to change the actual electrical impulses that the heart uses to open and close major heart valves. 4 valves were involved. They cauterize electrical circuits in the heart to create a calculated interruption. In the weeks and months that follow, scar tissue builds up. The scar tissue creates the desired interruption. It will take awhile to determine the degree of success but the doctor indicated that he witnessed the potential cause in a “right side” artery. That is better than my root canal where the doctor said “whoops”.
The operation was over at 10:00 AM. Grasshopper No. 1’s husband was set for the day. He had an Ipod that had been refreshed the night before. He had radios. He had magazines. He had errands to run. He was there to pull her through!
After a overnight stay, it was home and sleep. More sleep. My experience says that it will take the body 6 months to a year to adjust. Just because it was a one night stay gives a false sense of confidence. Any time you screw with the heart, it is serious.
The biggest caution now is to get the major groin artery to “knit” back together and regain it’s original strength. I guess the blood leakage from the operation creates an interesting bruise. An interesting large bruise.
So at this point in time, everything went as planned. Hopefully the long term results are as planned.
In this world of increasing electronic developments and micro-sized operating equipment it is amazing what they can do. It is incredible to think you can get 3 operating instruments in one artery.
So Monday it is back to work! Unbelievable. There must have been an an angel or two on her shoulder.
Love,
Dad

It bothers me when people confuse real estate terms because many decisions are made based on those terms.
First, is market value. This is the price at which a home transacts between a willing buyer and a willing seller. In truth, you don’t know what market value is until you have a signed real estate contract (and the deal closes).
Second, is the assessed value of your home. This is the estimate made by a city assessor and is based on recent sales of typical houses in your community. The assessed value is used for determining property taxes. It can be challenged if you think assessments are too high.
The last term is appraised value. I love this one because it can be almost anything you want it to be. It is the opinion of a theoretically unbiased third party who estimates market value. They are professionals but they are paid by bankers, mortgage brokers and real estate agents. There is a hint that their opinion of “market value” might vary based on who pays them. No, say it isn’t true! Bankers tend to use appraisors who deliver the appraisal that they need to make the loans. The hell you say. Beware of appraised values.
I have added a new category of people that go to the head of my financial “food chain”. They are the ultimate predator over real estate agents, car salesmen, insurance brokers and lawyers. It is the banker. In recent years, bankers have tended to make marginal loans. The 10% down requirement is no longer a deterrent. Appraisals of home values can be nudged higher (beyond market values) by making some absurd assumptions. Why do bankers become so magnanimous? It is in the high interest rates and fees, Grasshoppers. Yep, the bankers stick it to the guy who can least afford it. And then (are you ready) they charge management fees, processing fees, late fees and penalty fees to make even more money. No you say! Bastards!
If you are willing to go into really high risk territory, bankers will lend you 20%-25% in excess of home equity prices. How can they do it? Check the interest rates. Check the interest rates.
So what do you do? Trust the assessed value. It is usually based on sales of similar type homes to yours. Assessed values can be challenged. It is still an opinion by one person.
Beware of appraised values. They are influenced by many forces. Be suspicious of the people paying for the appraisal. The appraisal of your home determines whether you might sell.
You won’t know the market value of your home until it sells. Alas you finally get an answer.
Love,
Dad

The Memorial Day Weekend marks the beginning of Summer. Flowers bloom. Grass grows to a rich green color. Lilacs blossom for a short one week period. Baseball begins in earnest.
We have a new broadcast exclamation for a home run. Ryan Braun is being called up from a Brewers farm team to play 3rd base. He hits home runs. He is special. The Brewer Farm team he plays for has an announcer that calls a “home run” a “jack-jack-jackety-jack”. So get ready fans, when Braun hits a home run, Bob Uecker (Brewers broadcaster) is sure to say “it is a long ball, get up, get up, get out of here, another jack-jack-jackety-jack”! I hope not.
Memorial Day is the one day I hold in reverence. Soldiers died to keep this country free. Millions of soldiers! It is a day to say thank you! Of course some creep will burn an American flag. Isn’t free speech great.
Memorial Day was always a day of parades. VFW groups that had served in both World War I and II marched along with floats and high school marching bands. It was festive. It was solemn. It was a 21 gun salute at the local cemetery. It was a handfull of “spent” brass shell casings to play with from the salute.
Memorial Day was a trip to the cemetery with my Grandma Myrna to plant flowers at the “family” plot. My Grandfather had purchased grave sites for the family and had a huge marker placed on the location where generations were to be buried. Grandpa Chalk had a few bucks.
Memorial Day was the Indianapolis 500. 11:00 AM. The portable radio would carry “gentlemen, start you engines”. The announcers would take you though the 4 turns of the brickyard track. You could hear the race cars whistling past. Billy Vukavich, Roger Ward. A.J.Foyt. The race would last well into the later afternoon with a steady drone until one glorious final moment when the winner was declared. NASCAR didn’t exist.
Memorial Day is the start of the cottage season. For 25 years it was a place to go during the weekend. It was always too cold to swim but boats came alive on all the lakes. It meant “brat frys” and cookouts. It meant that the next 3 months would be conducive to family outings at the lake.
Memorial Day was always a Milwaukee Braves (not Brewers) double header. 6-8 hours of monotonous broadcast of the America’s favorite past-time. Blaine Walsh and Earl Gillespe were to become famous announcers. Andy Pafko played for the Braves in left field. My dad had befriended him in “tryouts” years earlier.
So go forth. Enjoy the respite. It is Memorial Day. Always remember the brave souls that gallantly fought and sacrificed so that we could live as we do. It is so easy to forget.
Love,
Dad

Can a little kid turn around the Milwaukee Brewer season? You know. Kids sometimes have dreams and wish very hard. The answer is yes, kids can turn fortunes around! I witnessed it on Sunday at Miller Park in Milwaukee.
The Brewers had lost 7 out of 9 games. They were still leading their division but tension was setting in. Would this team allow itself to fall into a deeper funk and ultimately end up in the “basement”? Grandson Dominic (along with Collin) said no! The Brewers have a team loaded with talent. J.J. Hardy is leading the league with home runs. Prince Fielder is close behind. Ben Sheets seems to be healthy. Suppan, Bush, Turnbow and lots more.
So we venture down to Miller Park where everything is free. I mean this is magic land. The place where heros play baseball. La-la-la-la-la.
Dominic wasn’t paying attention early in the ball game. It was hot dogs, nachos, soda and peanuts. No he didn’t get sick. By the 4th inning his mind “got into the ballgame”. The Brewers were behind 4-0. Enough is enough. Soon it was 5-2 in favor of the Minnesota Twins. And then it happened. One of the crowd favorites, Jeff Jenkins came to bat in the 5th inning with two men on base. He made contact with a fastball and drove it deep to center field. The center fielder (Hunter) went back to the wall and made a high leap. It was to no avail. The ball was long gone. Home Run! Dominic went bananas. High fives. Jumping. Bright eyes. One of his hero’s had tied the game. It was a moment to be savored.
By sheer will, Dominic made sure that Jenkins drove in one more run in the seventh and the Brewers edged ahead 6-5. The game ended with Capriano striking out 3 straight Minnesota Twin batters to a standing applause. The Brewers win. The Brewers win. The Brewers win.
I don’t know if the Brewer fortunes were actually reversed that day but the next day they won again in Los Angeles 9-5. If the Brewers go on to win the pennant, it all because my Grandson Dominic decided that enough was enough. The Brewers were not going fold while he was in the crowd. No sir.
It was a team effort. Collin seemed to know what was going to happen all day. Dominic’s dad (Paul) might claim that he helped turn fortunes around but I know better.
Did I mention that it is also free to sit in your car in the parking lot after the game for 1 hour as 39,000 fans push and shove to get out. It is amazing what booze does to sports fans.
It was a special day surrounded by special people.
Love,
Dad

Yep, I learned a new phrase. We went to see the play “Lion King” last night and one of the songs that is sung when life turns to sh– is “Hakuna Matata”. It means of course “no worries, be happy”. It is sung by a small lost lion cub named Simba and two idiots. Simba’s buddies, a wart hog and a weasel have very little grasp of reality so they block out the past by singing Hakuna Matata.
So when your house doesn’t sell in a reasonble amount of time, sing Hakuna Matata!
When your home loan is not approved, sing Hakuna Matata!
When your bathroom ceiling collapses from rain water leaking in, sing Hakuna Matata!
When your two heart procedures to restore normal rhythm don’t work, sing Hakuna Matata!
When gas prices go to $3.43 per gallon, sing Hakuna Matata!
You get the idea. It is a way to block out the pain and escape to la-la land. The reality is that the pain will return and you still have to deal with the problem. I am all for positive thinking but singing Hakuna Matata seems like a stretch. Oh, well.
We got to spend a great weekend in Minneapolis. The weather was good. The food was good. The companionship was excellent. Margaret and her cat were the focus of attention. On Mother’s Day morning, we decided to have breakfast with Margaret and Shawn at our Hyatt hotel because it was convenient before our departure. So Mom got tulips for Mother’s day and we had a nice breakfast. You know, a couple eggs, waffles, bacon and orange juice. The bill came and I reached for the check! $72 without tip! Holy Sh–! I didn’t want to buy the Hyatt, just eat there. I wish I had seen the Lion King, because I could have sung Hakuna Matata. I had an ace in the hole though. When we checked into the hotel we received a free breakfast coupon for two seniors in the Hyatt restaurant. I slipped that free breakfast coupon into the “jacket” for payment of two breakfasts and waited for the remaining balance for the other two. I got the bill down to $44 without tip. Hakuna Matata. Hakuna Matata. Hakuna Matata.
Try it! When you day turns to sh– sing Hakuna Matata. People will think you are nuts but you won’t care!
Love,
Dad

There was a lady in Atlanta who was very concerned about saving energy and while at the same time, reducing her costs. It seemed like a worthy objective.
The lady bought a package of light bulbs that have a swirling filament so that they look like a little white glass corkscrew. They are called CFL’s (compact florescent lights). They cost $20.00 for a package of 6. By my calculation, that makes the cost for a 100 watt bulb about $3.33. I think “regular soft white bulbs” cost between $1.00 and $1.50 each. The “energy savings” come from a CFL bulb that uses 75% less energy and last 6 times longer than a regular bulb. What a deal!
So where is the story? Well, CFL’s contain a small amount mercury sealed within the glass tubing. If you read the directions, they require special handling for disposal because mercury is a hazardous material. The lady was replacing a ceiling light bulb when she dropped it and it smashed on the floor. She had read instructions and she was concerned about how to clean up the broken light bulb. She called her local waste management agency for some help. They immediately told her not to try to clean up the floor herself. The local agency called in a hazardous waste management team (I think it is called HASMET) and they showed up in “moon suits”. The room was sealed off for several days and special equipment and cleaning supplies were used. The team finally left. It seems like a lot of action for a light bulb.
The lady received an invoice in the mail from her local waste management agency for $2001. That was the expense they incurred for the hazardous waste clean-up.
Now let me see. The lady bought a little fluorescent light bulb for $3.33 to save money and ends up spending over $2000. We need more savings like that. It sounds like a savings hell.
My question is this! Why would you introduce a product into the home environment that has the potential for harming the family? If mercury is hazardous, then find another material.
The lesson Grasshoppers is think for yourself. All the alarmists for “energy crisis” and “dangerous greenhouse gases” and “global warming” usually give you part of the information. Look behind the alarmists claims. “Common sense” applies.
Love,
Dad

You’ve all played the game “Monopoly”. It all starts very innocently with chosing a pretty figurine for the board. Money is divided and pretty soon there is the roll of the dice. Everybody is happy. Everybody has dreams of winning. As the game progresses, somebody lands on Boardwalk and buys the property. Pretty soon the same party buys “like” properties. Then a few “houses” are added followed by “hotels”. When another player unfortunately lands on Boardwalk containing 4 hotels, the game comes to an end. The player with the most chips wins. Nobody other than the winner is happy. For the losers, the game sucks. For the winner, the game is euphoric. Lets play on! Yeah, right!
Business life seems to follow the monopoly theme. The big companies get bigger because they have the money to grow and expand. The small companies get bought out by the “bigs” or they just go out of business. Do you see the similarities with “Monopoly”.
Now pretend that you are employed in this big game of changing dynamics. Pretend that you are not with one of the “bigs”. Your company sells out to a bigger company and plods on under new management. The promise is nothing will change. But suddenly you job is in jeopardy. What happened? Happy one day. Fearing the unknown the next.
Grasshopper No.5 has just gone through a year of installing a website in Minneapolis. It was a valiant effort. Awards were in order. It was a fun ride. Lots of recognition.
During the website establishment, your employer sells out to a private equity firm. Your company is now owned by investors with money looking to make more money. The first thing that a new firm does is look for ways to reduce cost to help pay for the acquisition and to eliminate duplicity in “like” operations. It is decided to reduce the work force by 7 percent. 145 employees across the corporation are being encouraged to retire early, accept a buyout lump sum or face job elimination. Huh? No surprise here, the Monopoly game is in play.
So Grasshopper No.5 who was sailing along this last year and having fun (meaningful involvement) is now watching as 145 comrades fear for their jobs. Could she be one of them? You bet! Even though she belongs to the Union, she is low on seniority and not really protected by longevity. She does however possess skills that would be very difficult to duplicate so she will probably continue in her present role.
One of my “Laws” is “there is no such thing as job security”. It is an illusion. If you believe you are secure in your mind, that is close as you can get to feeling job protection. While you toil in your job, there is this bigger game of business Monopoly being played and it can have brutal effects on the losing firms.
The lesson Grasshoppers is “approach each job as a business contract”. You are selling your services for an agreed price. Your services are being purchased with no long term promises. You owe them nothing. They owe you nothing. Be aware that in the larger scheme of things, your role could change tomorrow. All this is neither good or bad. It is fact! You need to continually make yourself valuable to the business world. There is a meaningful role for you. Bear in mind that the “Monopoly concept” is always in play.
Love,
Dad

Grasshopper No. 5 has burrowed into the professional life of Minneapolis. The story is work, work, work. This girl needs a talking to. She needs perspective. She needs to prioritize the important things in life. You get the idea.
If you have tried to contact No. 5 in the last year you know that it is very difficult. The Pony Express of the 1800’s was faster. Fresh horses could get a message to Minneapolis faster than the present e-mails or cell phones. I thought we lived in a world of instant communication.
Of course there is always the other side of the argument. Maybe she is busy, busy, busy. Maybe she has her day organized and refuses to let anything deter her from her goals. Maybe she returns e-mails and phone calls when she gets time. Maybe there are times she is just plain exhausted from work. Yeah, yeah, yeah!
No. 5 continues to get acclaim for her photography. You know she had a “showing” in one of the prominent galleries in Minneapolis last November. Now a well known bloggers organization has recognized her for one of the photos on her website. The photo is called Red Shoes.
In January, No. 5 received the Digital Edge award for the Star Tribunes vita.mn entertainment segment.
During the last year, the vita.mn received the quarterly Editor and Publisher award from the newspaper industry.
There is more. Yep. Vita.mn which contains newspaper articles was nominated for, and won the annual Publisher Award given for outstanding achievement. Grasshopper No. 5, her boss and 2 programers all get to attend a recognition dinner hosted by the Publisher. I think there are watches and jackets and things to remember the ocassion.
She is busy.
And you want to get a quick response from No. 5? You will be sandwiched in between her work deadlines and her award banquets.
Congratulations to Grasshopper No. 5. Life should be fun. It sounds like she is enjoying the ride. You guys are on your own in trying to get in touch with her. She remains “lost in Minneapolis”.
Love,
Dad

It was a Spring Saturday morning. Temperatures were forecast to be in low 60’s. The sky was partly sunny. There was a light wind.
Excitement abounded in Madison. People were gathering. 14,997 people were ready to run the 26th Crazylegs Classic named after Elroy Hirsch, the great Wisconsin football legend. In the crowd was a face I know and love. Yep, there she was! Grasshopper No. 2.
No. 2 had been training for months. In fact, late last year she was working her way up to running 5 miles without stopping. Somedays she ran 5 miles. Most days were less. Along the way there were pulled hamstrings, sore feet, new shoes to give better leg support and probably a few chiropractic adjustments. Are we having fun yet? The goal was to be able to run the Crazyleg marathon (8k or just over 5 miles). Why do people do this? Because they can! Grasshopper No. 2 needs challenges and excruciating pain will not deter her. Tell her that running an 8k represents insanity and she shouldn’t do it just tightens her jaw and gives her fuel for proving people wrong. She would run the 8k.
She did well. For those of you who have run 8k recently, it starts easily and then as time passes everything hurts. The thought of “what I am doing here has got to cross the mind”. But the miles go past. One mile. Two miles, Up hills. Down hills. Three miles. Suddenly you realize you can do this. The test of running up Observatory Hill is a little overwhelming but then you find a groove and you cruise the last two miles into Camp Randall Stadium. People are waiting and cheering. You completed you quest. Kind of like the the Little Engine that Could. Puff, puff, puff. In the crowd is your loving husband and two children. Yeah! Way to go mom!
So how did Grasshopper No. 2 do?
She “ran” the entire distance.
She finished the race in 45 minutes, 18 seconds.
She finished 4280 out of 9033 runners (the rest of the field walked). That is the top 47%.
She finished 38th in the field of females age 45-49. That is a terrific statistic.
She finished No.1 with her own family. Go mom, go!
And she finished No.1 with me. She is my daughter.
There is nothing better than dedicating yourself to a goal and then of course achieving it. That is what life is all about. No. 2 can drink deeply from the “Cup of Self-satisfaction”. This means of course, she has to set a new goal. Maybe in a day or two.
Love,
Dad

For the last year, Grasshopper No.1’s heart has been “all a flutter”. It could be love. It could be occasional excitement. The truth is they are not sure what trips the “flutter”
The fact is that the top part of her heart races to over 120 beats per minute at random times. That is twice the norm (60-80 beats per minute is standard). For awhile it was well in excess of 120 beats per minute.
No. 1 has had two heart procedures stopping the heart and then shocking it back into rhythm. That is kind of scary when you think about it but it is “an out-patient” procedure. It seemed to work when coupled with some strong medication. Some how the heart keeps returning to the “thump, thump, THUMPITY THUMP, thump thump pattern”. The “thumpity thumps” last for significant amounts of time.
The Wausau doctor treating No. 1 has recommended that she have a heart procedure where they go inside the heart and actually interrupt the electrical signals by producing scar tissue in the circuitry. I’m told the operation is called “ablation”. It is a 5-7 hour operation where they actually go into the heart through the arteries in both legs and produce scar tissue in each of the four major entrances and exits to the heart. The procedure has been around for over 25 years and the doctor performing the surgery learned the technique from the original inventor. No. 1’s doctor is located at St. Lukes in Milwaukee and for this particular operation is considered “God”. I guess if you are going to have someone screw with your heart, God is preferable.
So now we wait. The procedure should be performed in the next several weeks. Actually the doctor called last Friday and wanted to operate on Monday. Whoaaa! I don’t think so. Don’t you need to schedule replacements at work? Who’s time is more important here? The Doctor’s? Or the patient? The answer of course is the doctor. So very soon, there will be a call, there will be a trip to Milwaukee, a 5-7 hour operation will take place and hopefully everything will return to normal.
I’m sure Grasshopper No. 1 will be happy when the whole thing is over with. Uncertainty places a cloud over your whole life. Anytime you work with the heart, it is very serious. So here is a sincere “heartfelt” wish for a fast and successful operation.
Stay tuned!
Love,
Dad