My brother Jack died yesterday.
He was part of the “fabric” of my life. He was 3 years younger and when we were growing up, it seems like he was always present.
Jack was a large baby. I don’t recall the exact weight but I think he weighed between 11-12 pounds. 9 pounds was normal kid and 3 pounds was “stubborn”. The stubborn was blaimed on my mother’s side of the family, the Stillers. Jack always “pushed back” against authority. If you said black, he said white.
My Dad lived his dream of becoming a major league baseball player through Jack. To succeed in sports, you need to have a little bit of “nasty” in your personality. Jack was able to demonstrate that fine edge of athletic superiority. At an early age, Jack got a new catchers baseball mit. He had a solid physical build and he was strong. The magic route to the major leagues was through “catching”. My Dad coached Jack’s teams. He made sure Jack got as many baseball opportunties as possible. I remember one game when Jack was 11-12 years of age. Jack came to bat 3 times and hit 3 home runs. For the entire Pee-Wee league season, Jack batted .750 meaning he got 3 hits every 4 times he came to bat. That falls into the “wow” category.
My Dad always liked Jack’s sassy personality. What Dad wouldn’t like to coach a kid with lots of promise? Then my Dad died. Jack was 14. The one person that could manage Jack’s energy was now gone. Jack had no authority figure to “push back” against.
Jack’s life changed after my Dad died. He was constantly getting in trouble. My mother couldn’t manage him and eventually she signed to get him into the Navy. The Navy was the one new force in his life that he respected and he earned an honor guard assignment. Wouldn’t you know that a cyst on his thigh bone would force him out of the service after only 3 years. Here go went again. No authority figure to “push back” against.
I guess the good Lord was watching Jack because Mary Ann entered his life. She was as strong a “force” as Jack and was probably one of the few people that could play a major role in his life. If Jack got “pushy”, Mary Ann pushed right back. When Mary Ann passed away several years ago, Jack again had no person to “push back” against.
Jack’s early life held tremendous promise. He was smart in school. He was one hell of an athlete. He had a Dad who wanted to cultivate his talents. I guess in hind-sight, you could say that my Dad’s passing affected Jack the most.
Jack can stop fighting and “pushing back” now. He is in a better place. My prayer is that he finally found peace.
Love,
Dad