Ace Wisdom

It was 69 years ago that the Japanese bombed Pearl Harbor.  Dec.7, 1941.  It changed the American landscape.  We were at War.  It took 5 years and the lives of many soldiers to preserve our freedoms.  Shame on us if we don’t take advantage of the gift given to us by our ancestors.

I can’t resist the opportunity to share my thoughts on what it takes to be successful in the America that was preserved for us.

First, you need to take care of No.1 (you).  If you don’t take responsibility for yourself, who will?  It sounds selfish but taking care of yourself first is an axiom of life.  Once you master that skill, you can bring taking care of others into your life.

Second, pursue all the education you can.  It can be formal training through schools and universities or through the school of hard knocks.  Education belongs to you.  It can not be taken away from you.  This concept is really simple.  Education makes you more valuable to yourself and to the rest of the world.

Third, pursue a goal.  Follow your dreams.  Life needs a purpose.  If your don’t have a goal, you need to re-examine where you are in your life journey.  Remember it is your journey.  Your goal is just that, your goal.  You are trying to make your life meaningful.  Admit it.  There is something in your life you’ve always wanted.  You can make it happen.

This brings me back to the bombing of Pearl Harbor.  The men and women who died for us would be disappointed if we didn’t take advantage of the freedoms they preserved for us.  I think fighting for your personal rights, getting educated and following your dreams would make them proud.

Love,

Dad

Last Saturday was Grandson Tommy’s 10th birthday.  The celebration went on for days.

Next up?  Grandson Mitchell’s birthday on Dec.5.  He will spend the day playing a basketball tournament in Wisconsin Dells.  My birthday wish is that he score 30 points every game and his team wins the championship.  I think he turns 13 (?).

December holds more important birthdays.  My brother was born on Dec.27th.  I know he always felt cheated because Christmas and his birthday got blended together.  Also Dec.30th is Grasshopper No.2’s birthday.  She also felt cheated.  I think No.2 should talk to my brother.

I took my German automobile in for maintenance (the G– D— service light kept coming on).  It turns out I needed brake fluid and a “scope of the engine”.  When I was a kid, I could perform the same maintenance in 15-20 minutes.  It took Bergstrom 2.5 hours.  So far all maintenance is free but that will all end in the middle of next year.  Someone tell me how to disconnect the service light!

The “Jobs Report” was announced this morning for the month of November.  It was stinky.  That means that a lot of new jobs are still not becoming available.  Hang on to your cash.

There is hope.  Some college student has studied indicators of economic health.  If sales of Victoria’s Secret “uplifting” bras improves significantly, so does the economy.  The theory is that if women are willing to spend $50 to $250 per bra, discretionary spending is improving.   Bra sales are up!  Now there is a theory I can support!  It is an uplifting trend!

We are a fat society and it is getting worse.  Two overweight ladies were recently arrested exiting a mall because they had stolen merchandise stuffed between the folds of body fat.  This wasn’t just a bottle of perfume tucked under their arms.  They had denim jeans hidden between rolls of fat.  The women had 3 pairs of boots buried in the layers of fat.  How is that even possible?  I think a weight loss program is in order.  Maybe they will get it in jail.

The Badgers learn their “Bowl fate” on Sunday.  Roses!

The Green Bay Packers need to step up this weekend.  The Lambeau advantage will help.  Game time temperature will be 27 degrees.

Minneapolis is going to get 6 inches of snow tonight.  Didn’t they just get 10 inches?  J—-!

Stay warm!

Love,

Dad 

Your Mom and I did not go down to the UW Badger game last Saturday.  We wimped out.  It was tolerable weather with 30 degree temperatures, clear skies and windy.  Instead we sold the tickets to friends.  In hindsight, there are no regrets.  The game was over by the end of the first quarter.  Badgers are Big 10 Champions and headed for the Rose Bowl.  Anyone who attended a Badger game during the season witnessed a championship team.  Special.  The best part is that I have $200 cash from payment for the seats.

I also have a weekly ritual.  On Sunday mornings, I wander down to the “Pipes and Pages” newspaper stand on College Ave. and pick up my favorite Barron’s magazine.  It costs $5 per week plus tax.  By my calculation, I spend $273 per year.  Several weeks ago I got a solicitation to subscribe to Barron’s through the mail at the “professional rate” of $52 per year.  I have resisted the invitation in the past because I didn’t want to change my Sunday routine and I wasn’t sure when my subscription would arrive by mail.  Even I can take a risk.  I subscribed.  My magazine arrived on Monday (versus Sunday which is okay).  My savings of $221 per year is now taking place.  Again I have more cash in my pocket.

So in less than a week I picked up $200 for football tickets and $221 in savings for an annual subscription to Barron’s.  Life is good.

Yesterday I got a notice from the University of Wisconsin-Madison that my football ticket program was going up $200 next year.  Oops there goes part of my cash savings.  How can they do that?  We are in a recession.

The lesson Grasshoppers is that managing finances is an ongoing process.  The one part of your life you can control is your cash expenditures.  You can not control outside forces like ticket prices going up.  Use cash wisely.

Love,

Dad 

I found out yesterday that I have been deceived for most of my married years.  How could I have missed the deception.

My mother made the best turkey dressing in the world.  Her formula for success was a based on an old German recipe with lots or extra meat.  It had the standard giblets, celery, onions and hamburger.  It met my standard of excellence.

Then when I met your Mom, she introduced me to “Nana’s” German dressing.  It was really good but Nana introduced apple chunks to moisten things.  I liked the taste but occasionally I would bite in to a slice of apple.  Yuk.  So I offered my expert opinion!  Apples spoiled the dressing.

For years and years I have been praising your Mom’s dressing.  It was similar to my mother’s recipe and of course, it had no apples.

Guess what!  I found out that apples have been in my dressing forever.  Apples were just disguised by being cut into extremely small pieces, smashed into a pulp or ground up in a blender.  That way I wouldn’t notice the chunks of apple.  The theory was that I wouldn’t know the difference.

The deception was carried on by Grasshopper No.1 and Grasshopper No.4.  They knew that apple was in the dressing and they also chose to keep the secret from me.

Imagine my shock.  The people I trusted most in my life had decided that “what I don’t know won’t hurt me”.  Quietly they laughed.

All I can say is that I do have a sense of humor.  Ha-ha-ha-ha!  I also have a sense of retribution meaning what “goes around, comes around”.  The people who perpetrated this dastardly deception need to keep looking over their shoulder.  I will get the last laugh.

That being said, Grasshopper No.1’s Thanksgiving day dinner was scrumptious.  Her dressing (which had some apple chunks because she was too tired to disguise them) was excellent.  Could it be possible I’ve become accustomed to apples?  Say it isn’t so.  Even with the apple chunks in the dressing, Grasshopper No.1 remains my favorite.

Thanksgiving yesterday in Sheboygan was very nice.  As far as I know, there were no fights which are common at family get-togethers.  Thank you No.1 (and the love of her life).

Black Friday today.  Crazy people shop for things they don’t need but can’t pass up the attactive prices.

Love,

Dad

I have decided that I want to join the current trend of having a day named after me.  We could call it the “Ace Wisdom Day”.  I have noticed that there is no end to national days of celebration.  We have such days as President’s Day, Martin Luther King Day, Valentines Day, Ground Hog day, Sweetest Day, and Green Earth day.  We are running out of days.

So on my special day, the world would celebrate my accomplishments.  Like the Seinfeld sitcom, I admit that I don’t have any accomplishments.  I just got up everyday, lived my life as a kid, student, husband, father, philosopher and retiree.

Newspapers, television and radio would flood the world with stories of my contributions to mankind.  I can’t think of any contributions but give me some time to think about it.

The government would get the day off.  They always get the day off with pay for days of special occasion.

The Postal Service would get the day off because they follow government celebration.  With pay of course.

I would get an “advance” financial payment to write a book about my life about nothing.  I figure with such national acclaim, the initial payment would be $10 million.  If the book sells well I would write a sequel.  I think I’d make the sequel a romance novel.

I would share my success with my family.  Without the stellar support of my wife, kids and friends, I wouldn’t be what I am today: nothing!  After all, my national day is not about me but the people who have elevated me to the status of “nothing”.

I am proclaiming my national day before all 365 days get used up by other useless causes.  It will be April 23 every year and I will try to remain humble.

If Obama tries to claim the April 23 date as his, I will invite him to have a beer with me on my backyard porch to talk over the issue.  Please note I claimed the date first.

You might get the idea that I think all the special days that have been proclaimed throughout the years are stupid.  You would be right of course.  There are always exceptions.  Veterans Day and Memorial Day would remain forever.

If you want to proclaim a day for yourself, let me know.  I will help you with the application.

In the meantime you need to live a life of quiet desperation trying to survive day to day.  Why should you be any different?

Have a very Happy Thanksgiving.  Look around you, you have a lot to be thankful for.  Even if you don’t get a national day proclaimed for you, you each will always have a day that will be special to me.

Love,

Dad

I guess when the cry becomes “don’t touch my junk”, it is a new world.

When Bristol Palin (who seems like a sweet young girl) dances over the floor with the grace of a water buffalo and then makes it to the finals of “Dancing with the Stars” based on popularity of the family name, it is a new world.

A friend of mine went into the doctor because of an pimple on his butt.  It was diagnosed as a brain tumor.  I don’t what nationality he is?

Grandson Grant is a freshman at Middleton High School in Madison.  Tryouts were Monday to determine who would make the Freshman Squad.  Grant was worried that the competition would be fierce.  I asked him how tall he was.  He said 6 foot 3.5 inches tall.  Dah!  He would make the squad.  He did!  Congrats.  Over 45 kids were turned away.  It is a big achievement. Little guys like me don’t like the preferencial treatment big kids get in basketball.  That is not a new world.  Of course if I were tall, I’d flaunt it.

I understand daughter-in-law Jenny got a 95 on her final test for her “instructors license” as a hair stylist (I’m sure I got her profession wrong so I apologize).  Now the big money!  Congrats.  I will get free haircuts from the “master”.

Badgers need to grind out two more victories for an incredible season.

Favre, my favorite publicity hound, takes the field in Minnesota this weekend against the Packers.  At last check, he had two fractures in his ankle, 10 stitches in his jaw from a viscous hit, tendonitis in his elbow and severe pain in shoulder (the same one he had operated on in the off season).  As always he will start.  Don’t be deceived.  He is always dangerous.

I think (of course I’m always the last to know) we are going to Grasshopper No.1’s for Thanksgiving.  She makes the best “dressing”.  That is why she is my favorite.

Stay warm.  I actually saw a kid headed for bus stop this morning in a t-shirt.  It was 31 degrees.  I remember the days!

Love,

Dad

 

 

 

The newest energy bonanza is natural gas extracted from shale.  One or two miles down in the earth is a hard shale (a crystaline rock).  When the shale is cracked open, it releases natural gas that can be captured by gas wells.  This is a big deal.  Along the eastern mountain range of the U.S. and in southern states there is a lot of shale.  Estimates are that natural gas reserves are twice the size of the largest oil reserves in Saudi Arabia.

If your home has shale below it, energy companies will pay you big money for the rights to drill on your property.  It creates instant millionaires.  You would have to put up with an oil (gas) rig in your back yard but hell, with millions of dollars, you could move to any place you wanted.

All good things come with potential issues.  There have been areas that have allowed the drilling process to take place.  To crack shale, huge amounts of chemicals under high pressure must be pumped two miles into the ground.  The chemicals and pressure explode the shale releasing the gas.  The released natural gas is intended to be pumped to the earth surface and shipped around the country.  Some natural gas escapes on the way to the surface and has been known to find it’s way into ground waters.  Home owners with water wells can turn on their water faucets in their homes and light the water with a match.  Yep, water burns.

So now the dilemma.  You could become an instant millionaire if you allow drillers to tap shale under your home for natural gas.  You would not be able to drink water from the tap in your house because it could burn.  I wouldn’t want to take a shower or bath in “gas” contaminated water.  It would be dangerous to sit on your toilet not knowing whether it might explode (now there is a mental picture).

The gas companies are denying that their process is contaminating ground waters.  Yeah, and I believe in the Easter bunny and  the Tooth Fairy.

The question is, “if somebody offered you millions of dollars to drill for gas on your property and risk bad water for the rest of  your life, would you sell drilling rights”?

It sounds to me like this new gas drilling process isn’t all it is cracked up to be.

There is a big Badger football game this weekend.  Wisconsin travels to Michigan.  Michigan is a dangerous team because they have a “darting rabbit” for a quarterback.  He is tough to contain in the “pocket” and he can hurt the Badgers by running as well as passing.  Micheal Vick for the Philadelphia Eagles destroyed Washington last night.  Vick is a “darting rabbit”.  UW is prime to get surprised by Michigan.  Let Michigan surprise someone else.

Thanksgiving just over 1 week away.

Stay warm.

Love,

Dad