Ace Wisdom

The air waves are filled this morning with reports of Britney Spears being wheeled on a stretcher to an ambulance after holding police “at bay” for 2-3 hours. Something about being distraught over custody hearings for her kids. I’m sympathic to her situation but it seems that the democratic leader of Pakistan being assasinated might be slightly more important. How about the sale of plutonium to Iran? Hello! Or the fact that millions of Americans might lose their homes because of deceptive loan practices. We need to get our priorities right. Leave Britney alone!
Jay Leno is back “live” writing his own jokes. His observation last night was that the government is going to require fast food restaurants to disclose calories in each product.. “Isn’t there a common sense factor here? When you order large fries at McDonalds, you can expect a fat ass! If you tell them to super size the fries, you will get a super fat —.” Dah!
I am still discovering my Christmas gifts. I’ve had time to browse the pictorial book on the History of Plymouth (from the Grasshopper No.1 family). I thought I knew a lot about the city history especially the downtown area. I was wro–.
Plymouth was named after a town in Connecticut, the burial place of the sweetheart of one of the original founders, Tom Davidson. I didn’t know that!
Plymouth was the name chosen from potential candidates Springfield, Tahanta, Quitauite, Quit-Quit-Oc of course Plymouth. I didn’t know it was so difficult.
Many streets that I frequented as a kid where named after one of the original finanical giants, Horatio Nelson Smith, who helped lay out the street system. There is a Smith street along with streets named after his children Stafford, Caroline, Taylor and Elizabeth. I am obviously not very important because there is no “Charles” street. They missed an opportunity.
Believe it or not, the City Club was only one small piece of Plymouth history. There were other hotels, banks, breweries, flour mills and saw mills. Early businesses depended on the mullet river and nearby springs to survive.
I guess when you think about it, Plymouth has existed for 160 years on an official basis and the Andrews family only particapated for about 60 years. Yet to a kid growing up, World War II became the major event and my world revolved around the City Club.
So the historical collection of photos and facts in my Christmas present has been enjoyable.
The lesson Grasshoppers is that we all possess memories of childhood years. Those memories belong to each of us. They shaped our lives. Having a collection of photos recalling those memories in time is kind of neat.
So now it is on to other Christmas offerings. Come to think of it I used a free car wash certificate (given by Grasshopper No. 3) this morning. The Saab, colored white by salt crystals sprinkled with specks of black metal is now shining black like the black “grocery getter” (a Grasshopper No. 4 term) that it is.
I can’t wait to get into my Hardy Boy novel.
Love,
Dad

I finished my exercise this morning and the first thing I heard on WTMJ was the “Bud song”. The Badgers kick off the new year at 10:00 AM in Tampa at the prestigious Outback Bowl. If it weren’t for the the $3.5 million dollars being paid to the two teams, I would be more sarcastic. Hey, cash is cash.
We will elect a new President this year. Only 10 more months of “bullsh–” rhetoric. Time will tell if Tampons become part of the white house budget expense.
This will be a leap year. Everybody has one more day to screw things up (the other is view is that there is one more day to take advantage of opportunity).
Grasshopper No.1 and Grasshopper No.4 are Rats. According to the Zodiac, this is the year of the rat. Using the calculator provided by Google, Grasshoppers No.1 and No.4 were identified as “rats”. It is not as bad as you think. Rats are quick witted, clever and charming along with sharp and funny. They have excellent taste, can be good friends and are loyal to their families. They are motivated by money, they are curious and seek knowledge. There must be a flaw or two? No, I won’t go there. Still a rat is a rat.
So we look forward to Barry Bonds being found not guilty of using steroids (or tellings lies under oath). We look forward to O.J. Simpson being found not guilty of grand theft (not guilty as usual). The stock market will be up 15 percent and it will be revealed that the real Easter Bunny delivers golden eggs.
The Packers will win the Super Bowl, the Brewers will be World Champions and the Badger football team will finish No.1 in the nation for the first time ever.
Grasshopper No.1 will get her horse ranch.
Grasshopper No.2 will become a spokesman for Nike Sports.
Grasshopper No.3 will buy a power boat company.
Grasshopper No.4 will start his own “successful” business on his way to infinite riches.
Grassshopper No.5 will get married.
Happy New Year everyone.
Love,
Dad

The year 2007 is ending with one more snow storm. There is some symbolism with a storm coming because 2007 was somewhat unsettled.
This year was one of hope. The Packers are heading to the playoffs for the first time in 4 years and maybe a Super Bowl Championship. The Milwaukee Brewers were in the pennant chase until the last few days of the season. The Badgers football team had a good season and are unbeaten at home in the last two years.
The term “housing bubble” took us by storm. Foreclosures are occurring at record rates and the incompetence of the banking system is seen in full bloom.
We have accepted $3 per gallon for gasoline as standard and my prediction is that prices will only go higher.
Grasshopper No.1 endured a rare heart procedure (operation) and she has a normal “thumpety, thumpety, thumpety” heartbeart. Her gift is that her ordeal lets her understand and appreciate the important things in life.
Grasshopper No.2 gives new meaning to the name “Dear Abby”. Through her exercise regimen (encouraged and paid for by her employer), she has developed her own abdomen “six-pack” hence the nickname “Abby”. Her gift is that exercise and diet makes her feel good.
Grasshopper No.3 changed his life by moving to a house in the suburbs. It all comes with landscaping projects, painting rooms and replacing furnaces. His gift is that he seems to be in a good place in his life (exploding piston heads in his boat and all).
Grasshopper No.4 proved that anybody can “coach” a youth football team to a championship. As one of his coaches said at the end of the year, “so few times in your life do you experience a championship situation, you should savor the special moments”. They did! He did! His gift is that he has learned the meaning of earning more and spending less.
Grasshopper No.5 seems to be developing the passion in life. Her pictures show more innovation, color, black and white contrast and detail. Her gift is that she can see things through her own special lens. Damn, camera equipment is expensive.
Your Mom continues to strive for the perfect balance through self discovery including diet, excercise and nutrition. She is succeeding. I think Yoga is entering the mix.
And me? “Little Chuckie” from Plymouth, who married Shelby Jean from up on the hill, I lost 20 pounds of ugly fat (no I didn’t cut off my head). I do feel better especially when coupled with steady exercise.
So my wish to all is a healthy and prosperous 2008. My prediction is that “something good will happen to you”!
Love,
Dad

There is an ad on TV showing a wife receiving a box of Kleenex and a brown paper bag from her husband as Christmas gifts. They were certainly the gifts of a big spender! Then he takes his wife to the front window of the house and shows her the two matching convertible sports cars in the driveway. One for her. One for him. He hands her the Kleenex because she has tears of joy. He hands her the brown paper bag to breath into because she is hyperventilating and then she faints. The punchline of course is “priceless”.
My bride mysteriously left for the store yesterday. She needed to pick up some miscellaneous items for Christmas. Strange. I couldn’t believe we needed anything. I looked in the garage and the Saab (my chariot) was gone. She never takes the Saab. I knew it. She was headed for the local auto dealership to pick up the new car (she knows which one I’d like). I looked for Kleenex just in case I’d need it for the tears. I found a brown paper bag to handle any possible hyperventilation. Then I waited for her to come home fearing I’d pass out when I saw the new car. Mom got home and came into the living room and said she needed help with the soda and groceries. Sure she needed help! I knew better! I had to act like I didn’t know what was going on! You should have seen my face as I hauled in the soda and groceries from the salt stained Saab into the house. Priceless!
Isn’t it interesting the fantasy that Christmas brings. It is like Dominic seeing Santa in the night sky. Anything is possible. What a marvelous feeling.
So on this Christmas morning, far be it for be to destroy the illusion. In this life any thing is possible. Enjoy the dreams of the day!
Love,
Your Dad

My sister Addie and her husband Ike gave us a bright red fleece (soft) Bucky Badger blanket for Christmas. That blanket will stay with me in a comfortable chair as I watch the Packers (and Badgers on New Years Day) march to victory on TV. Truth be known, the blanket wasn’t as precious as spending an evening with my only sister reminiscing days gone by.
I get accused of not listening very well. Imagine that! I’ve been trying to “listen” to the Christmas season. The music at the local mall has been terrific. The Xavier Christmas Program was classic. I watched as Grandsons played in their Christmas music program at school. I “listened” as the special partner in my life got into the Christmas spirit.
You get the idea. My intent was to absorb as much of the season as possible. Christmas comes and goes so fast.
Christmas of course, starts and ends with the birth of the Christ Child. What a magnificent gift for mankind.
Christmas is the music.
Christmas is Children with dreams and wishes.
Christmas is family.
Christmas is good friends.
Christmas is good health.
I want you to know I failed. As hard as I tried, I just couldn’t absorb all the things around me. I missed a lot. I guess I didn’t listen as well as I could. Alas, wait until next year. I’ll try harder.
The lesson Grasshoppers is that Christmas is all the things around you and it offers memories, comfort and warmth if you “listen”. Try to enjoy as much as you can!
Merry Christmas to all!
Love,
Dad

Grasshopper No.1 and No.4 witnessed the “Christmas Train” coming into the station in Plymouth. It brings back memories because I would stand on the “platform” waiting for my dad to come home from World War II. My Grandpa Chalk also arranged for me to ride the switching trains with coal stoked engines and belching steam. It is impressive. There is one fact about trains. They are never on time. This was no exception. No I didn’t forget that Tom, Dominic and Tommy were there.
Just a note. The National Football League is not known for outstanding intelligence. How much intelligence is required to throw long, run fast and hit hard. On Sunday, Brian Westbrook for Philadelphia was running for what was an apparent touchdown. He got to the one yard line and fell down on purpose. His team only led by 4 points at the time. By falling down, the clock ran down to the two minute warning and then his quarterback took 3 “knees” because Dallas was out of time outs and the clock kept running. Philadelphia won by 4 points and took all the risk out of winning. I think Brian Westbrook went to Princeton. What the hell is he doing in the league? A thinking football player. Imagine that.
Okay, “its not fair”. I got a brochure from my local bank advertising current interest rates that they pay on various accounts. Would you believe that the bank pays you .55% on all savings accounts up to $10,000. Holy cow, it you invest 10K you get the credited with $55 at the end of one year. The same bank issues credit cards to as many people as possible and charges as high as 25% on the unpaid monthly balances. So if you had a $10,000 credit card balance (shame on you for running up that kind of a bill), you would pay $2500 in interest for not paying off your bill. Now let me see! On a savings account, you make $55. On an unpaid charge account you pay $2500. That doesn’t seem fair. It feels like an interest rate “warp”. Is this a great country or what?
By the way, if your kiddies want to establish good savings habits, they do pay a whopping 1% interest.
The lesson Grasshoppers is that you should always pay credit card bills in full so there is no interest penalty. Secondly, if you have money to invest, don’t go to your local bank. They pay lousy rates. Its not fair!
Love,
Dad

Tis’ the season! Your Mom and I went out for lunch this week at Chili’s restaurant. When it came time to pay the bill, it came stamped “no money due”. It was a holiday present from the manager. Is this a great time of the year or what? I’m sure it has nothing to do with all the money we spend there during the year.
Then our Saab, which is being held together by “white salt”, needed a car wash. I reached into my special drawer and pulled out a cash wash certificate from last Christmas (gratis of Grasshopper No. 3). My car wash was free. Is this a great season or what?
Then I turned on ESPN. It turns out the super relief pitcher just signed by the Milwaukee Brewers is named in the steroid scandal, Eric Gagne will get paid $10 million dollars next year plus incentives to stop other team hitters. It makes me feel better that Eric “pushes the edge” with his physical conditioning and the future bodes well for the future. Do we have a great national past-time or what?
Wednesday night we got to attend the Christmas music concert put on by the kids of High Point Christian School in Madison. Grasshopper No. 2 had two sons playing solo (or duo”s) for part of the presentation. Mitchell with his trumpet (ala “Satchmo”) and the Grantster with his inherited trombone talents wowed the audience. There is no question that our Grandsons stole the show. The holiday spirit lives!
So turn up the music, trim the tree and bake the cookies. The season is upon us. Hide the credit card bills until after the first of the year.
The lesson Grasshoppers is “Christmas time” is what you make of it. Keep it positive. Hug those close to you!
Love,
Dad