Ace Wisdom

Go Jack Bauer, go.  Your Mom and I finished Season 4 of the hit series “24” and we are part way into Season 5.  That means that TV programing stinks and watching “24” is the best alternative.

Grasshopper No.4 has purchased the current Turbo-Tax software.  I have started the same process.  The software does all the calculations and formating but you still have to gather the information for data entry.  There is always some bank or government agency that sends information after you finish your taxes.  Don’t file to quick.  To those of you who might profit from “cash only jobs”, be sure to report the income on your tax forms.  Remember you are on the honor system (especially you Sheboyganites).

This is a free year for those who die and leave a sizeable estates.  Last year, your estate if you died, would have paid federal and state estate taxes on everything over $7,000,000.  All estate taxes have been eliminated for this year only.  So for those of you with large estates, this would be a convenient year to pass away.  You people with large estates, you know who you are.

This is Super Bowl weekend.  People buy new HDTV’s just for the occasion.  Just making the Super Bowl the highlight of your weekend is symbolic of winter blues.  I picked Minnesota and the New York Jets to be in the Super Bowl.  Yep if you had ignored my picks and picked the other teams, you could have won a lot of money.  So if you want to make a ton of money on the Super Bowl game, pick against me.  I pick Indianapolis.

The good news is that the days are getting longer and when the sun comes out, it melts sidewalks and driveways.  Summer is not far away.

Have a nice weekend.

Love,

Dad

 

Rumor has it that Grand-daughter Dano’s Mercury “puked”.  It is vintage 1992.  Originally it belonged to Nana and Grandpa George.  They babied it and drove it very few miles.  When Nana couldn’t drive anymore, Debs bought it.  And now 18 years later, Dano has it.  A faulty transmission appears too expensive to fix.  The car will either get donated to the “Rawhide Boy’s Ranch” or get scrapped.

Now to the Dodge.  My Grandma Myrna never learned how to drive.  Her husband Chalk drove a Buick until he died in1946.  For several years after he died, the 1940 Buick sat in the Garage in back of the City Club.  It Myrna had to go somewhere, she paid a bar-room patron to drive her Buick.  Myrna liked the independence of owning the Buick even though she couldn’t drive.  Then after she married husband No.2 (Chuck Andes), he talked her into replacing the Buick with a black four door Dodge (I believe it was 1950).  So now instead of a Buick sitting in the garage, a Dodge sat in the garage.  It had an automatic transmission with fluid drive.  I called it “slush-o-matic”.  The engine would roar, the fluid transmission would take forever to shift and it would go from 0 miles per hour to 60 miles per hour in 2 hours.

When I turned 16 in 1956, I got my drivers license but I didn’t have a car yet.  Grandma Myrna would let me drive her to do errands.  Being a young kid, I always knew that the Dodge was in the Garage so I would pester Myrna to let me use it.  She was a “softie” and most time I could get the car.  I took the car on dates and used it to cruise up and down the main streets of Plymouth.  I eventually got my own car but whenever I needed alternate transportation, there was always the Dodge.

Then 3 years later, brother Jack got his drivers license.  He began to pester Myrna to use the Dodge also.  Jack logged a lot of miles on the Dodge.  He also drove it more aggressively than I did.  He “pounded” it.  Wouldn’t you know that he would run the car out of oil on one of his excursions. The car was 10-11 years old.  Myrna never got the engine fixed and so ended the story of the Dodge in the Garage.

My brother Jerry never got to use the Dodge (he can blame Jack).

The lesson Grasshoppers is that most of us have a car story from when we were growing up.  Myrna’s Dodge in the Garage is one of my fond memories.  The fate of Dano’s Mercury and Myna’s Dodge appear to be the same.  It is called “scrap heap”.

Puxsutawney Phil (the famous groundhog) saw his shadow this morning.  There will be 6 more weeks of winter.  Stay warm.

Love,

Dad

 

 

I was traveling south yesterday towards Fort Atkinson when my fine European automobile (at least the accelerators don’t stick) had a warning light displayed on my dash control panel.  I had my co-pilot look up the meaning of the warning in our 227 page instruction book.  Did you catch that?  227 pages!  After fooling around with buttons and lights, I determined my oil was down one quart (imagine my panic).  What do they expect when oil changes are scheduled 15,000 miles apart?

Why can’t I have my simple instrument panel back.  Oil pressure was on display.  Engine temperature was on display.  Most people checked their oil when they got gas by pullling out dipstick.  I dare you to lift your car hood and even find the dipstick.  Simple works.

Our Camry has escaped the “sticking accelerator” recall.  2005 was a very good year.

The Fireside program was a 50’s and 60’s music review.  Lots of toe tapping music.  I’d recommend it to anyone.

Tomorrow night is a full moon.  All you gals can fire up those broom sticks and I’ll look for long broom handles and pointed hats in the night sky.  Lots of wickedness on display.  Strange things happen on full moon days.

I’ve got to keep this blog short so I watch the end of “The Electric Horseman”.  The horse goes free and the girl leaves Redford.  Can life get get any better?

Stay warm.

Love,

Dad

 

 

 

I watched Brett Favre take a pounding Sunday.  New Orleans made sure he got beat up.  When he got tackled or “bumped”, the defensive line man would make sure all 350 pounds came down directly on Favre.  Again and again and again.  By the end of the game, I was still encouraging him to get up like the warrior he is but secretly I had the hope that he would just stay “down”.

“Stay down”?  You are talking Favre.  In the third quarter, he personally thought he might have broke an ankle.  He almost crawled to the sideline.  They retaped the ankle, probably found some pain killers and there he was, running back onto the field.  You are talking “heart” here.  His Dad had taught him if you can get up, you can play.  The team depended on him.  All it would take was a few more passes for a win.  His competitive juices were flowing.  His team was depending on him.

And then when the game was on the line at the end, Favre had the chance to use his head as he rolled out to pass.  All his receivers were guarded.  He could try to force the ball to a receiver (as he always did in critical moments) or he could have limped 10 yards forward because nobody was anywhere near tackling him.  The limping 10 yards foward would have given his team a chance at a field goal by Ryan Longwell (who is terrific in critical situations) and a trip to the Super Bowl.  We witnessed the famous “brain fart”.  Favre tried to force the ball down the field and it was intercepted.  The game changed on that play.  So many games changed in the late moments because Brett thought he could do the impossible.  Now the Vikings can wait until next year to see if he will return.  Packer fans know the feeling.

I will say this!  Favre is fun to watch.  He may be the toughest son-of-a-bitch I have ever watched.  In Brett’s view, the game isn’t over until the clock runs out.  He has had the enthusiasm of a little kid.  He is “human”.  He has tasted victory but way too many defeats.  Favre is always standing at the end of the game.  After 309 consecutive starts, he may just be the “last warrior”.  He is a good guy.  He is my hero.

We will know in August whether Favre will play again.  We will have to wait again?  Yep we will have to wait again.

Stay warm.

Love,

Dad

Being able to endure pain is symbolic of being “macho”.  Some people handle pain better than others.

I have had a “low grade” pain in my lower jaw for a month.  It usually means that a tooth is abscessed and eventually forces a dental “root canal”.  The pain can reach levels that force you to offer your first born for relief.  Yesterday my troublesome tooth began “pounding” and pain killers didn’t help.  I think I had tears in my eyes.   So much for “macho man”.

My regular dentist was gone.  His son was covering for him.  Usually that means doing some-thing temporary until his Dad gets back.  Not in this case.  Within an hour, the existing crown was popped off my tooth, my mouth was numbed with novacaine and most of the infected root was extracted.  A temporary cap was put on the tooth and several weeks from now the root canal will be completed (along with a brand new crown).  I know that root canals run $800 and new crowns another $800.  The exorbinant costs make me angry.  Having my life back without pain is priceless.

On top of incurring large dental costs, my free lunches have run out.  Our Christmas gift card to our favorite restaurant has been used up and I have to begin using my own money.  Awwwww!

This weekend sets the stage for the Super Bowl.  The winner of the Jets/Colts game will play the winner of the Favre/New Orleans game in the big event in Miami.  There is a lot of complex analysis that can take place but the truth is that a couple fumbles or interceptions can determine winners.  I believe “quirky” destiny will prevail.  Wouldn’t it be interesting if Favre’s team made it to the Super Bowl and had to face the New York Jets (the team he dumped after one year).  The ultimate irony would be that the Jets then beat Favre in the Super Bowl.  No.  No.  Say it couldn’t happen!  You have just received by prediction.

By the way, I am not a macho man.  I have no desire to be a macho man.  Just call me Whimpy.  Make the pain go away!

Stay dry this weekend.

Love,

Dad

 

It has been almost two weeks since Nana passed away.  There remain lots of detailed issues that need to be resolved on her behalf.

All of the friends and family that made contributions to the “Nana Memorial” need to be acknowledged.  That means lots of “thank you” cards.  The money needs to be directed to the proper places.

The financial affairs of Nana need to be finalized.  It sounds easy but someone has to figure out her monthly expenses (starting with her checkbook) and then estimate expenditures up to the date of her death.  It involves lots guesses.

Don’t forget notifying important agencies.   Social Security.  Medicare and Medicade.  Banks.  Utilities.  Some of it requires a Certificate of Death to prove legitimate action.

The Funeral Home needs to be paid.  Nana had the foresight to set up a “funeral trust” into which money was placed to cover final expenses.  The question is “was enough money put into the trust”?

The IRS doesn’t forget about Nana.  She is obligated to file a tax return for 2009.  Collecting necessary information to file on her behalf sounds easy but with all the medical programs that she was involved with, it could be very complicated.  Nana only lived 6 days during 2010 but my guess is the IRS is going to require a final return at the end of this year.  Nana is probably smiling because she don’t have to worry about the IRS any more.  I wonder, if she doesn’t file, will they put her in jail?

Nana didn’t have too many personal possessions anymore, but I’m sure there were memories attached to some items.  In some cases her wishes for disbursement were known.  In some cases a guess has to be made.

I know Mom has begun sorting out many of Nana’s pictures.  Nana cherished family pics especially those containing Grandchildren and Great-Grandchildren.  I think some distribution of the photos will be made.

Finally there is filling the void created when anyone special leaves us.  It is the memories that sustain us.

The lesson Grasshoppers is that all our lives are intertwined with complexities of the world.  There are lots of detailed pieces at the end.  The good news is that the departed no longer have to worry about them.

Love,

Dad 

I finally got my car washed this morning (using a another free coupon).  It now goes faster and burns less gas.

Grasshopper No.5 got her grey car washed (it was again red after the wash) when she got here from Minneapolis last Monday.  She knew she could park the clean car in our garage for a day and it could thaw out.  I don’t want to say her Mini-Cooper is small but it takes up less room than my snow-blower.

On the way home from Nana’s funeral, Grasshopper No.5 was in the backseat.  Family stories were being shared.  I noticed that No.5 constantly had her eyes directed downward.  The stinker was twittering her friends with her Blackberry (or equivalent).  She pretended to be listening but was busy doing other things.

In business, the power of the electronic revolution has long been recognized.  Instant communcation has helped companies serve their customers with amazing efficiency.  The internet is their friend.

As you know, electronic devices make the internet available to everyone.  Powerful home computers and wireless phone devices now make instant transfer of information available to you and I.  Is that really a good thing?

I don’t think ADD (attention deficit disorder) is an inherited condition.  We train our kids and our population to have a the attention span of a new puppy.  It starts with e-mail.  Factor in blogs (yes I’m guilty), podcasts, and e-books.  I know that Grasshopper streamed 3 seasons of Dexter on her home computer.  Then there is twixing, tweeting and twittering.  If need more diversions, you can always plug into Facebook.

When do people bond?  Whatever happened to “eye to eye” contact?  We keep inventing an infinite number of ways for people to p— away time.

Come on people, read a book.  Exercise at your local gym.  Walk the dog.  Have meaningful conversations with the people around you (real eye to eye contact).  There is a real world out there.  Stop figuring out ways to waste time.

The lesson Grasshoppers is that we live in a world where wonderful communication devices exist.  Use them as effective tools.  Don’t let the internet rule your lives.

Love,

Dad