Paul’s “little league” football team was scheduled to play a game last night. Play was delayed because one of his players found a white powdery substance on the field. Head Coach Paul suspended play immediately and the Sheboygan Police were called into investigate. After a complete analysis, forensic experts determined that the white substance was actually the goal line. It was a substance completely foreign to Paul’s players. The game started and the police were confident that Paul’s team would not encounter the white substance again this year.
Just spoofing! I understand Paul’s team won 6-0 last night.
Scoring at Camp Randall has all kinds of meanings. The first game of the year was against Washington State. A young man and a young woman were “making out” in the stall of a women’s upper deck restroom during the game. They were reported and when the police arrived they were hurriedly putting on their jeans. When asked to produce their tickets, the guy obliged and the lady couldn’t find hers. Oops, her pants were inside out. She couldn’t find the pockets. They both had blood alcohol levels twice the legal limit. The police took them down to the station and the young man was heard asking his partner “what was you name again”?
Grasshopper No. 3 was invited to last weeks Notre Dame’s football game at South Bend, Indiana. Notre Dame lost to Michigan State (Wisconsin’s opponent this week). He saw “Touchdown Jesus” and the Golden Dome. He hobnobbed with Tom Izzo (the basketball coach at Michigan State) and he watched the Irish go down in flames again. Grasshopper No. 3 got to witness history as the Irish lost their 4th game in a row to start the season. This has never happened before to the blessed group of warriors. Sh– happens. Irish fans are hurting. Grasshopper No. 3 told them to “rub some dirt on it”.
Tomorrow is Camp Randall and the Michigan State Spartans are coming to town. Should be a good game. The place will be jumping. I think they have beefed up security in the women’s rest rooms.
Who said football wasn’t exciting?
Love,
Dad